NARRATED ON: 23 Dec 2010 at 09:00
MINNESOTA TRAGEDY
What I knew and When
I promised to put the
record straight to all friends and relatives especially the Mwanyagetinge
fraternity who actively participated in the funeral plans following the October
tragedy where three lives were lost through murder in Minnesota.
At about 4 pm 13th 2010,
my cousin Justus Ogendi Kebabe called me from Minnesota and left me a
distressful voice message on my phone. I called him back immediately, and he
started crying over the phone. I urged him to tell me what was going on. My
first worry was about his mother (my aunt) who has been ailing in recent years.
He said he was fed up
with life because of frustrations and that he didn’t see the need to live. He
asked me to tell family members and friends that in case anything happened to
him, it was because of the pain he has endured in recent years and would not
stand it anymore.
We talked for about 30
minutes and during the conversation, he kept breaking and starting to cry over
the phone. I asked him to calm down and tell me exactly the frustrations he was
going through and if he had shared it with his immediate family, relatives or
friends. I do not want to duel on these frustrations in this narrative. Without
being specific, he asked me to convey to my mother (her aunt) that he loves her
and she will dearly miss him. He further told me to tell family members not
worry about him in case anything happened.
I tried to comfort him
by reassuring him that all will be okay and that challenges are part of life. I
requested him to take a break from Minnesota and come to stay with me in New
Jersey.
I kept begging him not
to hurt himself because my initial worry was about his safety. It didn’t
pass in my mind that he will end up killing his wife and two children. I
kept imploring him to trust God and reminded him that his life was precious
than anything else irrespective of the pain he was going through. He was often
distraught and incoherent; often breaking over the phone and wobbling with
words during our conversation.
Finally, he promised
that he would not hurt himself. He promised to call me the following day to let
me know his plans especially my request of asking him to move to New Jersey. As
we were talking, I would hear the sound of a child (children) and television
from the background. Finally, he told me that, he was feeling much better
after talking to me.
Frantic efforts and contacting Police
I realized my cousin was
on imminent danger and at about 4:45 pm, I called Justus’s brother who also
lives in Minnesota, but his phone could not go through. I tried another cousin
also living in the same state but would not reach her either. In New Jersey, I
called two friends to seek their counsel. The first was Mr. Denzel Musumba, the
owner of the E. A. Radio USA, who told me that best thing for my cousin was to
change the environment and meet new people to talk to in order to share his
frustrations.
Mr. Denzel even offered
to contact a friend in Minnesota to accommodate my cousin. The second person I
contacted was a Jamaican friend, who advised me to call the police, and. being
a medical practitioner, she advised me that my cousin was on the last stage of
committing suicide. I was extremely scared.
Immediately, I called
411 and requested the operator to route me to police in Minneapolis in order to
report the matter. I spoke to a female officer who asked my details and those
of my cousin and why I thought Mr. Kebabe was on the imminent danger to his own
life. She also wanted to know the town where Mr. Kebabe lived but I didn’t
know. However, I provided her with the telephone landline in order to pull out
Mr. Kebabe’s residential address.
After the said
conversation, I called my cousin again just to know how he was feeling. He
again promised to call me the following day to tell me of his arrangements to
come to New Jersey.
At about 5.45 pm, I
received a phone call from a male police officer who told me that they had
called my cousin and asked him what the problem was but he told them he was
taking the children out for dinner. They asked him to wait
for them so that he would tell them what problems he was having. After asking
me a few questions about my earlier conversation with my cousin. The police
officer promised to update me by phone on any development after seeing him. To
be honest, I requested the police not to divulge to him that I was the one who
informed them about his situation. They agreed to call me later and inform me
accordingly.
I do remember requesting
the police officer why they decided to call my cousin instead of going straight
to him privately. However, I would not get a definite answer. After this
conversation with the police officer, I tried calling my cousin several times
on his mobile phone and landline, but they remained unanswered.
Finally, at around 9 pm,
I received a call from one of my cousins I had tried to contact earlier, and
she gave me the phone number of Mr. Evans, a brother to Justus. After telling
him what transpired earlier between his brother, and me, as usual, he called
his brother, but all his phone remained unanswered. He finally decided to call
the police who actually told him that I had contacted them from New Jersey
about his brother’s situation.
They told Evans that
they were heading to Justus’s apartment. After meeting, the police asked
Evans to remain outside as they went into his brother’s apartment, where they
spent approximately 45 minutes in the apartment. When they came out, they asked
him to go home and promised to contact him after analyzing the documents they
had gathered in the apartment. They told him they didn’t find anybody in the
apartment.
Official confirmation of the murder by Police
In the early hour
of 14th October 2010, I got a call from the police
in Minnesota who officially conveyed to me that Justus was in custody and he
had confessed killing his wife and two children. They informed me that the
youngest child was alive and on government care. They congratulated me for the
courage I showed to report the matter and from this point, the tragedy was
officially pronounced, and the news was all over in blogs, social networks,
radio and the print media in the US and Kenya.
FINGER POINTING & THREAT TO MY LIFE
I’m equally sorrowful
Brothers and sisters,
the above narrative depicts what I knew before the demise of my relatives. It’s
extremely tragic to lose two productive adult lives; one gone forever and the
other awaiting sentencing to waste behind bars to pay for his crime. Two innocent
beautiful children are gone forever. They hadn’t lived even half of their
father’s age. It’s hard; it's tough to endure and both families need
prayers.
I believe today that if
someone would have acted in a timely version, the two beautiful children and
their mother will be with us today. I personally tried my best several hundreds
of kilometers away, but it was too late. However, in Godly realms, whether we
are in sorrow or in joy, we give God all the Glory.
From October 13th to
November 19th, 2010, when the victims were laid to rest, I
never made any efforts or plans to frustrate the grieving family. I am
personally griefing because the victims were my relatives. The late Kinley and
Ivyn, wiped out by their own father, who is my maternal cousin, were my nephew
and niece respectively. Here was Bilha, a wife to my cousin who also called my
cousin. I remember a conversation we had this August when she invited me to
visit them in Minnesota. She sounded a caring mother with a good heart; very
pleasant to talk to. She wanted me to talk to the kids, but they had gone to
bed. Moreover, today, the three are not with us anymore.
Mass hate
Today, on the eyes of
many, especially the bereaved family, I’m viewed from a negative prism; almost
compared to the one who committed the crime. I have tried to take stock of the mistake I did to become the subject of malice, blackmail, finger pointing,
curses insults and threats to my life but I don’t see any.
Crime is never and will
never be a collective matter for a family. A driver who causes an accident is
judged individually; excluding passengers. I manage to be a cousin to Mr.
Kebabe and I leave this to God. Justice will be served in January 2011, during
the sentencing and I Lister Nyaringo or any member of Kebabe family will not be
standing alongside Justus. He will be judged individually excluding his mother,
father, siblings, relatives, and friends.
My original intent to
call the Police from New Jersey was a swift response to a cry from the
wilderness. Here was a man sounding suicidal, distraught and frustrated. Here
was a man who was in harm's way and mine was to try and find a way to help him.
In addition to trying to reach the relevant people to talk to him, I realized
that contacting the police was the best option. Moreover, I’m accused of having
known every detail that culminated to the demise of the three.
I’m not writing this as
a defense because I haven’t hurt or offended anybody. I haven’t broken any law
related to this matter whether in Kenya or the US where the crime was
committed. I’m generally putting the record straight to the Kenyan community
especially (Mwanyagetinge) who worked hard with the bereaved family on funeral
arrangements. This also goes out to Kenyans who have been fed with lies and
falsehoods about me since the tragedy became known. Reputation is jewelry that
every person always strives to protect and defend especially when one is being
accused wrongfully.
How can you do good,
sensible and humane and still be accused and labeled as a beast, killer, and
murderer yet the real the killer is in custody awaiting sentencing for the heinous crime he committed? Did I ask God to make the Kebabe family my
relatives?
Why should fellow
Kenyans (Kisiis) hatch a plan to hire thugs to kill me, saying I was frustrating
the mourning family when I actually made concerted efforts to avert the tragedy
after sensing its imminence? I was personally in the mourning stage. However,
being an outsider, it will be purely hypocritical to say I was mourning more
than the bereaved family. Nevertheless, the fact remains they were all mourning
and are deeply touched by the heinous crime committed to the three innocent
lives.
From a humanistic sight,
the two murdered children were my blood relatives killed with their mother by a
man who is my blood cousin now in the dungeon. I’m deeply affected, and this
one applies to my cousin Mr. Evans Kebabe in Minnesota who like me has been a
subject of negative cycle talk since the tragedy occurred. Mr. Evans lost a
sister-in-law, a niece and a nephew and his own blood brother are now wasting
behind bars. In fact, he has received unprintable epithets from people he is
supposed to reach out to for comfort because he is equally traumatized by the
tragedy. Like everybody else in his family, Evans his innocent and does not
know why his brother did what he did to wipe out his family.
How will you feel when
you go to condole a family (your relatives) and instead, you are questioned
like a suspect in police custody and threatened to be beaten up? Thank
God, in the US, the law is strict and very protective; God forbid, it will be
totally a different story today if it was in Kenya.
When I decided to visit the bereaved family in Jersey City, New
Jersey, my intention was to spend time with them to comfort, reflect, pray and encourage one another. However, family
members of the late Bilha accused me of having known about the killing four
days earlier and that the phone call that I made to police was just a cover-up.
I’m asking them for purposes of clarity to call the law enforcement in
Minnesota to gather facts on these unfounded allegations.
It's disheartening that
I visited the family as a relative but instead of appreciating my love and
compassion, the voice recorder and pictured me without my consent; saying they
were doing it to portray that our meeting was peaceful in case I left and later
allege that they wanted to fight me.
My cousin Evans in
Minnesota and I were accused of having been behind the denial of travel Visas
for family members who wanted to travel from Kenya to attend the burial in The US and this was widely covered in the print and electronic media in Kenya and
the US. These made me wonder how for heaven's sake, a Kenyan or any foreign
national will influence the American government to deny or issue a Visa to
people visiting the country. Visa issuance is a discretion of the US Department
of State and me, Lister Nyaringo or anybody from the Kebabe family has no
authority over it. All Kenyans should know this and many of those who made this
wild allegation has lived in America for over 20 years and should know better.
Defiling the pulpit with hate
Truth must be told in
order to set all of us free. The shameful experience I saw earlier did not
deter me from attending a memorial service held for the victims and coordinated
by a Kenyan led SDA The church at Saint Patrick Cathedral in Jersey City.
During the service, I became the subject of finger-pointing and insults from
the “pulpit” from fellow Kisiis.
Unprintable epithets
were hurled at me as I sat pensively holding my cheeks in the parked Cathedral.
In my lifetime as a Christian, I have never seen the pulpit turned into a den
of such hate and rancour. Those who espouse the Christian faith must remember
that in our age, The Body of “Christ is under attack.”
Until those who have
been anointed to preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ about the Kingdom of God
change their tact and stop preaching water and drinking wine, our society at
home and abroad will continue sinking in disunity, rumour mongering, backbiting,
idle gossip, strife envy, and clanism. We need tranquility, fraternity, and
brotherhood in sorrow and in joy. We need our Church leaders to be at the front
line in championing societal tenets that brings our people together and not
those tearing us apart.
During the memorial
service, reconciliation, love, and forgiveness between the two families hit by
the tragedy were a vocabulary from most Church leaders and mourners who spoke.
About 500 people attended the memorial including dozens of Caucasian folks,
Latinos, People from the Caribbean and the Mayor of Vadnais Heights in
Minnesota where the tragedy occurred. Since I would not bear the insults
which were often followed by clapping and foot thumping from the mourners. I
decided to walk out leaving the memorial service a halfway.
The threat to my life
At midnight after the
memorial service, an anonymous caller to my phone urged me to stop frustrating
the bereaved family on the media failure to which, I will be shot to death.
This was actually a confirmation to a plan a friend confided to me earlier, that
was hatched by people who congregated in the brother to the bereaved in Jersey
City to hire thugs to kill me.
My opinion on mass media
On the issue of the
media, I’m not a journalist by profession but I do contribute clips which are
occasionally featured in Blogs and the print media in Kenya. I’m also a great
fan of the East Africa Blog Talk Radio which airs from Las Vegas. Secondly, during
the circus over the burial place for the victims, my opinion was for the
victims to be buried in Kenya to give the larger family chance to mourn and be
able to come to terms with the tragedy. I supported this idea as a
personal opinion on the mass media in the US and Kenya and the verbatim, print
and electronic clips are handy for whoever wants to get more clarity.
The second accusation on
my part was why the tragedy circulated to the mass media before the bereaved
family was informed. Truly for the right-thinking Kenyans, I’m a relative to
the Kebabe family and, I didn’t know any relative of the late Bilha until later
when I learned that her brother lives in New Jersey. Moreover, when the police
discovered the murder, they brought my name to the picture has been the person
who called them. This is how the media in Minnesota picked the news and started
looking for me to provide them with information. The media out there always
want to make news and everyone know this.
Question of my truthfulness
I want to remind those
who said that I have some issues to answer as the last person who spoke to Mr.
Justus Kebabe before the murder was unraveled to remember that in any country,
there are rules that govern investigations once a crime has been committed. I made
a call hundred of miles from Minnesota to alert the law enforcement to help a
human being who needed help. Anybody who suspects foul play should call the
Ramsey County Sheriff's Department to get more information on my wrongdoing. On
Earth and in heaven, I did what I did think that it was the right thing to do
by responding to a distress call.
Forging ahead with forgiveness and reconciliation
I want to confess in
words that I didn’t do anything wrong to deserve the spiritual agony, mental
torture, and psychological ordeal that I’m going through. Before my God, my
friends and my enemies; God his my ultimate witness in what I have done, and
will do in the future. Despite the insults, accusations, epithets, and curses,
I live everything to God because he knows man’s intentions and he is the
perfect reader of our hearts.
I never told my cousin
to kill his family or run away from the authorities. I didn’t behave inhumanly
to the bereaved family because reaching out to them with humility, love, and
compassion after the tragedy was a reflection of my understanding their pain.
Most importantly,
calling the police was a search for help for my cousin who sounded suicidal. To
me, it was an act of love and compassion and being a brother or sister’s
keeper. If I didn’t take any step after learning that his soul was almost losing its purpose
and that he was engulfed with amnesia on the utility of human life, I will be the most tormented person in the globe. However,
when humanity does not acknowledge the good we try to do in the world, I shake
off the dust, move on by thanking and accepting what God has instilled in me.
I don’t care whether you
are a friend, relative, enemy, sibling, parent or employer. If I discover that
you are engulfed with what my cousin was in, I will repeat the same thing for
the rest of my life and I will never be derailed by those whose intention is to
soil my name through innuendo and blackmail.
As far as I am
concerned, I did all I could for the sake of humanity. I have written these
words not to elicit another debate or flare up tempers after the three victims
have been laid to rest but to shed light by putting the record straight
especially to those in the Kisii community here in the US whose negative view
on me must be re-corrected. I am telling them the original version of what
transpired before and after the tragic murder.
May this matter settle
and may those out there who tarnished my image by uttering curses from the
pulpit remember that I have forgiven them from the deep bottom of my heart. The
God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob knows my heart. Let us join hands to
appreciate each other as human beings to forge for reconciliation and build
avenues for fraternity, sisterhood, brotherhood, common bonds and unity in joy
and in grief.
For mistakes, whether
conscious and unconscious related to the tragedy if any, I believe and trust
that God has already forgiven me and that I rejoice in his name. I
confess before humans and God that as the sun continues to rise and set, very
soon, many will discover that I was right and that as I trample on this earth,
I will always try to be right.
Finally, in my oneness
with God’s will, if there is one out there holding me negatively, hating me or
reflecting me on bad light during and after the tragedy, I kindly ask you to
forgive me. I ask God who is behind our presence in this world to strengthen
all of us and use us as vessels and lovers of humanity instead of haters of
humanity. God bless all.
Joseph Lister Nyaringo
